(no subject)

[solitary_summer]

I whine and complain too much, am too focused on what I dislike. And I'd really like to claim that I'm trying to change that, to be more open, positive and interested, but I'm not sure it'd be justified.

I'm still the person who will read the first paragraph or first two sentences of a book, and discard it unless I'm immediately fascinated.

There surely must have been something to like about Farscape except Teh Pretty, if only I'd looked harder? And Friday evening can't have been all that bad?


I'm irritable and cranky and dissatisfied with myself right now; yesterday when my father talked to my sister about her diss, for a moment there I really felt like crying out of pure jealousy; I thought I was over that. And Friday I kept thinking that I didn't want to be this boring person sitting around in a boring restaurant listening to other people's boring conversations, I wanted excitement and challenge and intellectually stimulating discussions, and, god, I'm not sure what I wanted, but certainly more than that.

I do know this isn't a reasonable, mature frame of mind; just ignore me. I guess it's spring finally approaching that makes me so restless.


Gah. Probably a good thing that I have to go shower and wash my hair now, because I'll meet with R. and we're going to see Brokeback Mountain.


::wanders off::

Comments

[czaria.livejournal.com]

Off topic but, what is that picture of in your user pic? It looks like the tummy of a large, scary spider I saw once. Thankfully, it was on the other side of a window.

[solitary-summer.livejournal.com]

This (http://pics.livejournal.com/solitary_summer/pic/000fx74g/g3) is the un-cropped version, it's by Louise Bourgeoise. And spider probably isn't far off, she made quite a few spider sculptures.