Well, the simplest, safest response to that is that I know I am not interested in condemning RTD as a homophobe and I was never expecting to see an uber-sexualization of or hoping to see a picket fences domestication of Jack and Ianto in S3. So, it bothers me when I feel I'm getting lumped in with the wrong crowd. :P

It doesn't bother me to hear that others liked CoE, so long as they're not telling me that I have to, to stay in fandom. And it's great that your take on their relationship makes it work for you, but I had much higher hopes for the Ianto character. So, for me, it was all kinds of wrong and cheap and somewhat out-of-step characterization. I blame some of that on the reasons you've mentioned elsewhere (last minute changes in the plot, on set changes by directors/actors, the lack of a set plan for the series from the start), but mostly on the choice to reduce Ianto to 'the love interest plot device to break Jack,' when I wanted so much more for him. (And that last bit, separate from anything that I didn't like about CoE, is what keeps me hanging on to fandom - where characters can live beyond their non-existent lives.)

So, it was a surprise to me when the Jack/Alonso scene in EoT2 made me feel a little better.

Keep talking. :)